Friday, October 2, 2009

A sleepy day

Yesterday, Lauren upped my amitriptyline from 30 to 40 milligrams, to see if it would help me sleep, and not only did I get a good night's sleep, but I've been drifting in and out of sleep all day. Feeling as weak and out of it as I do, this is just as good a way to pass the time as any.

I had an appointment with a film crew who are making a documentary for PBS about the disability rights movement, but when they showed up at one o'clock they decided they couldn't film because of the construction noise from the house across the street that is being remodeled. They went to talk to the workmen, who said that they wouldn't be working tomorrow, so it has been rescheduled to be shot then. Talking about this stuff always energizes me, so I'm looking forward to it. And on Sunday we're scheduled to go to Dan's for a small dinner party--David Oaks will be in town--and if I'm not feeling strong enough to get there it will be moved here.

But today I just feel very blue and useless and sick and tired of going on and on like this. My head hurts, I'm weak, it's hard to breathe, and I just go from the bed to the chair and there just doesn't seem to be any point to it any more.

Marty surprised me with a cheesecake he had mail ordered from Junior's in Brooklyn ( --the real New York cheesecake we're always talking about. We're trying to decide whether to bring it on Sunday or just eat it all ourselves! The only pleasure I seem to find these days is in eating all kinds of fattening goodies.


  1. Dear Judi,

    It's been a while...
    I live in downtown Frederick, MD --
    have for about 15 years.

    Well, we have this big event every year...
    In the Streets.
    I was walking down Market Street
    just an hour ago,
    and guess who had a booth?
    Our local On Our Own -- going strong.
    They asked me to be on their Board.

    Of course, I told them about how I discovered your small, book that saved me, and how you encouraged me to start an On Our Own group at Rev. David Eaton's All Souls Unitarian Church over thirty years ago.

    A lot of water has gone under the bridge,
    but I will always remember how important you have been in my life and how meaningful your work and your spirit have been to countless others.

    Judi, you will live forever in many hearts.


    Alan Feinberg

  2. Hi Judi,
    Cheesecake sounds good, wish I could pop by for a piece.
    Thinking of you.

  3. Hi Judi,

    You have always been both a mentor and a teacher to me, first in the psychiatric survivors' movement and now in the life well lived/hospice movement. Enjoy every moment - cheesecake and all. You are in my heart.

    Cindy Peterson-Dana

    Cindy Peterson-Dana

  4. Hey Cindy! I'm trying to get in touch with you, I happened to find this through Google. No Facebook? lol I'm in Texas! Drop me a line at or my Facebook page,, I'd be looking forward with getting in touch with you! xox