Yesterday we had a big meeting with all my hospice staff (Lauren, Louise [the back-up nurse], Katrina, and Marie), plus Laurel and Ann [Judy was on vacation], and of course, Marty, Julie and Jim, and me. The idea was to make sure that everyone had the same information, knew what to look out for, when to call hospice, and were coordinating with each other. I was having one of those days when I was just feeling very tired, and I sat in my recliner, often with my eyes closed. Some people thought I was sleeping but I told them I was listening, and I am sure I was awake the whole time. It looks like we'll now have a schedule with someone here from about eleven in the morning till seven or so at night, every day, whether Marty is here or not. This should take some pressure off him as, even if he is here, there can be someone else taking care of getting me the things I need, and just generally keeping me company. There's also going to be a log book where people can leave notes for each other to make sure information gets shared.
At this point, I still feel that I can make most of my own decisions, but I know there are days that I can't (like the days when I had that fever); and in the future I'm sure I will need substituted decision-making more. The important thing is that people are carrying out my wishes for how I want things to be.
After that it was a pretty quiet day. I had called Lisa to reschedule my massage, because of the meeting, so she is going to come today instead. In the afternoon, I had visitors--Joe, Helen, and Cheryl, who are involved in the local self-help organization, and we talked for awhile, but I was getting tired and I think actually did start falling asleep, so they said they didn't want to tire me out, but it was nice having conversations that had nothing to do with sickness or "important" things--we talked about stuff like movies and TV shows we liked (and discovered a shared fondness for the old TV version of "Mission: Impossible"--not the movies).
Wednesday evening I surprised Marty by suggesting we go out to dinner. I hadn't been out of the house for two weeks, and after my shower I was feeling really good. We went to a nearby Greek restaurant where I had a dish I really love--lamb shank braised till it is falling off the bone. It was nice being out and I didn't even get that tired.
Tomorrow I will be going out again to the hair salon, and I need to find someplace to get a pedicure. The place I used to go may be closed (I tried calling and got a "this number is not in service" recording), so I will have to call around. I could go back to the place I went last time but I think I really prefer the whirlpool bath to having my feet just soaking in a big basin). It's funny that with all the "important" stuff going on, this is what's important to me right now. And anything that makes me feel good is something I should be doing.