A scary moment

I decided to sleep in the recliner again last night. I was very drowsy and had been drifting in and out of sleep for an hour or two, so around ten Marty set me up with the stuff I need and shut out the lights, and said that he would be going to bed soon himself. I was drifting off comfortably when suddenly I heard a crash. I had no idea what it was, but I was scared and kept calling out Marty's name, getting even more scared when he didn't answer. I wasn't sure what to do, but I finally got up out of the sleeping bag and got my walker. He wasn't in the office, so I headed toward the bedroom, where I found him half asleep sitting up in bed, not sure of what had fallen. I was just relieved that he was okay, but it took a long while for me catch my breath, which was extremely unpleasant.

After that, it took several hours for me to calm down enough to get to sleep, although I finally was able to sleep soundly. Today has been a day when I've had lot of trouble breathing, so I have been drifting off quite easily all day, and I hope I will slip into an easy sleep tonight. I've talked with Lauren several times, who directed me to take various medications on a schedule, and report back to her. I continue to be quite short of breath--I guess it will be important to see how I feel in the morning.

I'm back to feeling that there's not much use to living like this. Maybe tomorrow I can try to put together something for the New York Times, to show myself, once again, that my brain still works.